I met Erin nine years ago. Actually, I’ve never met her in person. We were in the same coaching certification training pod – even though we called in from two different coasts. What I remember most about my first impression of her is this: she’s got it together. But what I’ve come to love about Erin is this: she keeps it real.
Erin’s new book Moms Mean Business is out THIS WEEK. And while there is a heck of a lot to celebrate, Erin keeps it real, once again. Without further ado, the beautiful Erin:
Brave is not one of the adjectives I’d readily use to describe myself. I’m scared of bees, spending the night in my house when my husband isn’t home, and dark parking lots. I don’t walk alone at night, speak in front of a group if I can help it, or eat most potluck offerings. I’m also very afraid of putting myself out there in a big way – and yet, my recently finished project is all about putting myself out there in a bigger way than I’ve ever dared.
You see, I’ve just written and published my first book. I’ve been working on it slowly for years—and then very quickly for the past several months. I recruited a fabulous co-author and I relished the process of writing. When we were ready, we found an agent and sold the book to a publisher very soon after that.
But, now, just as I officially become an author, my main tasks have shifted from the very safe environment of my home office and one-on-one phone calls with my co-author to exposure on the World Wide Web – and the big scary realm beyond my front door. I’m shifting from writer to marketer and promoter and, while I do have a marketing background, I’m much more comfortable talking about products and services that are not my own.
It is a time of vulnerability for me, as I ask people I know – and don’t know – to read my book, to interview me, to trust me.
All the while, I’m feeling excited. I’ve dreamed of writing a book for a very long time. There is a possibility that the book will propel my career to new heights. Or in a new direction. I’m excited because I’m meeting new people. I’ve accomplished a huge project. And, did I mention we have a publicist? That definitely excites me.
But I’m also feeling terrified. I’m terrified that the book won’t be well received. I’m terrified that my friends won’t like it and won’t know what to say to me. And I’m terrified because I know there will be criticism. That just goes with the territory. It’s unavoidable. Yet, boy, would I love to avoid it. This new world of social media and 24/7 activity also means that people can say really mean things while hidden in anonymity.
As I take in the comments and feedback, I don’t get to enjoy that same level of anonymity. My name is on the book cover. Our website has my email address on it. Our Facebook page tells me when people comment. And then there is the book trailer, which not only has my name but actual video footage of me that is posted for all to see on YouTube.
I’m a behind the scenes type of gal. I’m not a “Hey, I shot a video and now I want you to watch it” sort of gal.
In fact, my hands were trembling during the taping of my first radio show, which aired in Houston. Luckily, my brain took over and I managed to sound fairly articulate but, wow, while getting the first interview over with was a huge relief, there are opportunities to do more of them and that’s scary, too. What if the second one doesn’t go as well as the first? What if the host is not as gracious?
And as much as I fear being out there in the world in this more visible way, there is the flip side: what if the book hits the shelves and all we hear is silence? What if the only people who buy it are our friends and family? What if a few others buy it, too, but don’t think it’s that great? What if there’s an initial wave of excitement and then it all goes away as suddenly as it appeared? What if, what if, what if…
Then there is the biggest fear of all. Let me explain: Writing a book has been a dream of mine for years—like 20 years or maybe even longer. Something strange happens when we accomplish a big goal, when we get “there”—to the place we’ve been wanting to be for years. We get “there” and discover nothing is different. Or, if things are different, it’s actually for the worse. Insecurities become more pronounced. The pressure we put on ourselves for “what’s next” is intense. Sometimes, we even get absolutely stuck.
In fact, I’ve just finished reading The Mockingbird Next Door, which provides great insight into Harper Lee’s life from a writer who was given rare access by Harper herself. As you probably know, Harper Lee never wrote another book after the success of To Kill a Mockingbird. What stopped her? The author of this new book intimates that Harper Lee just didn’t think she could live up to the hype that everyone would have expected from her.
What Harper Lee experienced is something I’m going to have to work through to some degree. It’s the pressure we put on ourselves to strive for what’s next. It’s the human desire to make whatever comes next bigger and better than what came before.
And, yet, when I have my wits about me and I can stop all of the chatter in my head, the bottom line is this: I wrote a book. I loved the experience. I’m growing as a result of it. I’ve stretched my boundaries and I will continue to stretch them even further.
Bravery is all about noticing the fear, feeling it fully and then daring to move toward what you want with all the courage you can muster. That’s exactly what I have done and what I will continue to do—trembling hands and all.
{About Erin Baebler: Erin has spent the past 10 years coaching women in transition through her company, Magnolia Workshop. She has been featured on several mom-focused blogs and websites, had an essay published in Chicken Soup for the Soul: New Moms and was a contributor to Five Must Know Secrets for Today’s College Girl. She recently wrote her first book: Moms Mean Business: A Guide to Creating a Successful Company and Happy Life as a Mom Entrepreneur with her co-author Lara Galloway. She and her husband have two children and live in Seattle.}
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